Thursday, February 28, 2008
No one belongs here as much as you.
And this is why: Kyle Polk encourages me in a way that no one else does. Perhaps this is because I value his opinions and criticisms more than anyone else's. And perhaps that's because he processes his ideas for a while before speaking them. You will rarely hear him speak something that he doesn't absolutely believe and that's because the idea has been tossed about in his weird little head for long enough that he's behind it 100%. (This doesn't mean he's always right, but just that his opinion is rarely - if ever - a knee-jerk reaction.)
Today, Kyle told me, "I wish people saw you the way I see you."
And here are my thoughts on that.
"Hello, nicest boy of my life. Tonight, you can share my bed."
But seriously, you would all hate me. If I were vulnerable, selfish, mean, honest, dirty (bordering on disgusting at times) with you like I am with him ... If you saw my emotions run the gamut between elation and exasperation and ire ... If you saw these things in me the way my husband has seen them, you would hate me. You would worry - as I'm sure he does at times - about my sanity.
I love my marriage. I apologize to anyone who has heard me make derogatory comments about my marriage - or marriage in general - because I am only going for the easy joke. I never intend to defame what has been so good to me.
Not every moment is golden and glorious, but there are days that make the ugly ones completely worth it. We make a good team, he and I. We support each other and each believes the other is capable of more and pushes them until they reach it - or believes until they find that belief in themselves.
I regretted it immediately but couldn't bring the words back. Because it's not true. It IS, but the problems it answers are worth the problems it creates.
Anyway. It was on my mind.
Meagan if you ever read this, I didn't mean it!! Find a good man and marry him. It'll be among the best decisions of your life!
To Peck - If anybody knows how far we've come, it's you. After all, yours was the car we most made-out in during our college years! :)
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]